Not sure if I mentioned it once or a bazillion times before, but I have been planning on doing a half marathon and well, this weekend I did it.
It was mental. I haven’t felt such a spectrum of emotions over 2 plus hours as I did yesterday.
Before the race there was a bit of shaking with excitement and anticipation as well as waves of anxiety of the sphincter clenching variety.
Overwhelming joy where the tears just want to flow standing there with my team as the starters gun goes off. Joy and bliss as I cruised along for the first 10k’s. Contentment as a cool breeze gently caressed me around Albert Park.
Breath taking joy and a lot of arm waving when I saw my team along the route. A very brief bit of boredom somewhere around 16kms. Pain for a while as I wondered if I was losing a toe nail.
Confusion as I experienced waves of weird butt pain. Concern when I realised I am going to do another half marathon in December. Pain as I pushed through the last 3 kilometers. Love as I listened to my tunes and thinking of those that suggested them.
Anger at the person who decided to have us run over a feking bridge at the 19+km mark. Disappointment when I knew I wasn’t going to make my desired time. Determination as I pushed it up a notch running into the MCG.
More joy, pride and tears as I strided onto the hallowed ground that is ‘The G’. A bit more disappointment as I realised I still had to run around the bloody oval. Humour as a fellow competitor informed me it was best to walk this bit “because are you ever going to be able to walk on ‘The G man’!!”.
Determination at pushing it harder to beat those 3 people in front of me through the big red arch. More tears of joy and relief and grit as I crossed the finish line. Bit more disappointment at my time followed by complete and utter joy at seeing my family and my team mates.
This was probably one of the hardest things I have ever done. But I did it. And I will do it again, taking from this, and those around me, so many lessons.
The day after I am not so hard on myself, I ran 21.43k yesterday for 2:24 (but the Garmin said 2:22 for 21.1ks and I’m taking that). Non-stop, I’m proud of that.
When I first started running a few years ago, 300m was as far as I could go before I needed a break. My first kilometre was amazing. My first 5km was amazing. A year ago I was still recovering from my broken foot. I still can’t believe I ran a half marathon.
Me, the person who said she never ran, would never run. But I have an amazing family, friends and a team (who I now call my dear friends) that believed in me, who encouraged me.
And all I needed to do was run. Just run.