Wednesday, 23 October 2013

Why aye man

I watched my first episode of Geordie Shore today.

My verdict - less of the ‘aye’ and more of the ‘why’? 

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SWTF are these guys up to.

I’ve seen a few episodes of Jersey Shore (same same but different format) but, ermergerd, these lasses make Snooki look like a saint.

I got the banter, I could understand that (I have Ant & Dec and watching countless episodes of Alan Shearer on MotD to thank for that *hat tip*), but it wasn’t how they were saying it, it was what they were saying.

Any program where you can say “It’s like she was sewing my fanny flaps together” has got to be a bit off. Hilarious, in the spluttering, oh my god can you believe it kinda of way, and that was the tame bit.

You also got to see a bit of “knob sucking”, a couple having a pissed root in the shower then a hand shandy under the covers. 

Seriously - they know there are camera’s right? 

Based in Newcastle Upon Tyne it has been running since 2011 on MTV and follows a group of Geordies out having loads of fun at home and abroad, whilst wearing very little clothing, a lot of bronzer (not gender specific) and drinking loads of shots.

Oh yeah, in this one episode there was also some pissing in a box, Charlotte I think,  and one of the girls smacking her boyfriend across the face, which then prompted him to go out and drop £10,000 on an engagement ring. Classy.

I felt hung-over just watching it, you know that queazy feeling where a little bit of bile keeps coming up, but I couldn’t turn away. That. 

Now the episode is over I feel hollow and a wee bit grotty, with a hankering for a kebab. I’m not sure if I will ever recover my moral high ground, I'm thinking I should probably watch another episode to check.

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  1. Oh dear god. This sounds like Housos with a lobotomy. Will look forward to your next update;-)

  2. I've also watched it and had the misfortune to also catch a dew minutes of 'The Valleys', which is the more down graded and porney Welsh version. The Valleys absolutely beggars belief and makes Geordie shore lok like a bunch of classy ladies wot lunch, I kid you not. And Im nae snob about such things, I like to balance the PhD research with some good old fashioned 'TOWIE' (The only way is Essex), twice a week. I'm quite happyto admit that I like celebrity big brother and TOWIE to any old uptight academic, even if they do look down their noses at me, but The Valleys is just too scummy by far...pah-uke! Nae class at all, getting tattoos on their fannys is just the tip of the ideberg. I don't get the sex under a duvet live on TV thing either....minging!

  3. You see. Our love of shitty UK TV and dumplings makes us friends for life. I love Geordie Shore. Sooner or later another channel will bring out a new version of it somewhere else and it's likely to be even trashier. I can't imagine how that is possible but I'll be here waiting, waiting, waiting .....


Hey there, what do you think? x